Tuesday, October 5, 2010

The Final Humiliation

But probably not. Those momzers over at PetSmart finally got That Person to fill out a form for discounts. She says she spends over 75% of her budget at that place so she filled it out. Imagine my impotent outrage when I learned that She checked me off as a reptile in the box that offered to send a birthday card to 'your pet'. Okay, so She also checked dog, but then wrote below 'The dog can't read', the implication being that the reptile can. So I can look forward in March to a birthday card addressed to a reptile! I have to put up with things no living creature (including reptiles) should ever have to experience. Then She ran around the house singing something called Eric the Half a Bee. There was no place to check off insect. I'm sure She would have written that in by hand if She'd thought of it.

Speaking of hands, oh Her right hand is all screwed up so She can hardly use it anymore. She has pain on the back of the hand and a mysterious finger so She has to see a hand doctor next week. With all of this you'd think She'd leave off playing that damned guitar and the one song She knows (and I use the word 'knows' rather loosely). The song that makes Her cry. It makes me cry I can tell you. It is not pleasant around here. Not one bit. I managed to upload the picture She took of the PetSmart application. I mean, really. She thinks she's so funny! If only the Humane Society knew about this. I'm online looking for their website.
Your (NOT) reptilian friend,
Frankie T Wallace, Seriously the Dog Star